Saturday, March 5, 2011

Exciting Blue Collar Adventures



I work a blue collar job for numerous reasons, but most practically because I am prone to arrogance, and a job connected with any measurable status would turn me into a living dildo.

My current self-made prison is the produce department of a supermarket. My shift begins at 4 AM, which helps me avoid having any sort of normal social life. It gives me plenty of time to be a starving artist, plenty of opportunities to starve. Though I do enjoy cooking for myself. Problem is my counter space is so limited that it deters any elaborate meal preparations. It is rare that I have more than an entree. I try to create dishes that incorporate many things together so my meals will be more balanced.

At my job I mainly think all day about writing fiction (sometimes also about writing music), though sometimes I think about woman and loneliness. Then I look at my married coworkers and I am again glad to be unattached. Most of my time is spent engrossed in my own thoughts and I only appreciate the truly annoying or the truly absurd in the external world of the work place.

Chances are, if you are a reasonable shopper, I never notice you. If you are obnoxious, bullheaded, ignorant of the world, I probably remember you quite well.

On the more positive side, we receive produce from many different sources, so occasionally we get interesting boxes. The other morning we received a particularly notable brand of cabbage, and after putting out the cabbage, I cut from the side of the box these two phrases: God Loves You and Chucky Love You. (Note: Chucky Love You is also written in Spanish, Korean and Japanese.) I then placed the cardboard bearing these words of encouragement atop our white board. I don't know if anyone else was inspired by this brave act on my part.

We all must do our part.

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